Times are a-changing.....

We celebrated graduation this weekend...well, thursday and friday. It has been a fun last two days of partying!

Thursday night was the Faculty of Nursing Pinning Ceremony. I hadn't really thought about our grad until the day before. It hasn't been on the top of my priority list. Well, once we (Christina and I) got there and we're chatting with all the grads, including Kendra, I started to realize how special this experience really is! I started to feel really honored and proud to be finished my degree (except my senior practice which begins next week). I did four years of university and am emerging with an actual career! That is something to be proud about! And so I will be!

Here is a funny and sweet little story! During the Pinning Ceremony, we had to line up and each grad went up to the stage seperately to shake the Dean's hand and receive a pin. Before going up, someone read your name aloud for all to hear. Well, I was concentrating on not tripping while walking up the few stairs and across the stage to where the Dean was standing. I started to shake his hand when I heard, loudly, from the balcony......"Way to go, beautiful!!!". Well, the entire place heard it along with me and there was a buzz and some chuckles in the audience. My lovely hubbie had cheered very loudly for me. I was tickled inside, and a little embarassed as I, with a very red and warm face, finished shaking hands, explained that the fellow in the balcony was indeed my husband and turned to face the audience and walk back down the aisle to my seat. Ahhh....love.

Friday night, last night, was the party! We had our grad dinner and dance, tropical style, at Canad Inns Polo Park. It was really quite fun to dress up all formal, see my babe in a suit, and dance the night away! Boy, Steph and Christina have incredible endurance on the dance floor! They hardly stopped all night! I needed breaks in between for sure! My poor hips needed rest from all the swinging and shaking! A little different style than the regular worshipful sunday morning dancing (which I must say is still my fav).

So, now some doors in my life are closing and some are opening. Graduation really did signify the end of my time at the University of Manitoba and saying good-bye to all our fellow nursing students really was the end of something. Yesterday was also my last day at Unity Massage. I can't work there while doing my senior practicum because of the crazy shift work, and senior practicum is full time hours anyways. So, ode to the life as a student, the familiarity of the university campus and my nice job as a receptionist. Hello, ward nursing!

I begin my senior practicum at St. Boniface on Labor and Delivery on tuesday night. I begin on a set of 3 nights! Yikes! I hope that I adjust to my new schedule of life well! It should be an incredible learning experience and I hope to absolutely love my time there! I am going to miss all my evenings and weekends with Shaner though. There will be some weeks were we just pass like ships in the dark unfortunately.

So, off I go to relax a little more before bed! Ta ta for now!

Ahhhhhh......going for a massage today!

I'm pretty excited to relax for an hour and not have to give someone a massage back! It will be wonderful! This massage (yeah benefits!) and a hair cut this past weekend were two treats for being finished my semester!
I've spent this morning at home working on my proposal for practicum. My practicum schedule is looking better to me since my last post. I was pretty bummed but I'm adjusting now! I think I just might finish the proposal today! That would be such a load off! All exams for my degree are over and done! No more classes either! I'm almost there! I can't believe that the end is almost here. It went by really fast!

This thursday and friday are grad! It should be a fun time! It is going to be weird to say good-bye to all the fellow nursing students!

I've had a bunch of blogging thoughts in the last while, but I haven't taken the time yet to actually type them out! Maybe a little later! It takes less time to blog the regular life things and more time and thought to go a little deeper!

It has been a long time since my last post and today's post is not a great representative of what has been happening generally in my life lately...

It is kind of a crappy day. I've spent the entire day inside, going between studying for my exam tonight and tomorrow's too, and distracting myself on the computer.

My crappy day began with receiving the practicum schedule that I have been waiting for for weeks already! I finally got it......and it is pretty sucky. I work more weekends than I was told I would have to. I will have to miss a bunch of things in the next 3 months that I love. For example, I work 8 out of 11 sundays, including my first anniversary. Sundays are pretty special for me....and I will be missing most of them. I'm just pretty bummed about it. I had myself a nice, hands-over-face, cry out loud experience at the kitchen table this morning. If felt a little better but I might have to do it again. Not really a great day to have gotten the schedule with an exam this evening and no brain for it, or motivation to study. Well, good thing that I'm not worried about tonight's exam. It is tomorrow's that I'm concerned about.

So, to make this somewhat positive instead of all complaining, here are some positive parts:
- by 4pm tomorrow I am finished all my exams of my degree (beside my national RN exam in August)
- I get to go for coffee after my exam tomorrow with a good friend whom I haven't seen one-on-one in a while!
- At least I am doing my senior practicum in an area that I hope I absolutely love and therefore it won't be so difficult to miss out on other loved things.
- the good thing about working so many evening shifts is that I get to sleep in.
- starting with my first 3 shifts all being nights will be a nice excuse for why I'm totally disoriented and don't know anything
- having 4 plus preceptors means that I can learn a bunch of different styles and if I don't absolutely gel with one, there is still many others!
- my last day is July 20....so already there is secured dates for this process. I appreciate knowing the beginning and the end.

I'll have to post when I'm a little happier! Back to the books for another hour....exam starts in less than 2 hours! If you think of me, say a little prayer. Thanks!

Yesterday was my last day of classes forever........well, for now, probably not forever!

I have 5 exams left, 3 on tuesday and 2 the following week! And a heck of a lot of preparation to do for my senior practicum which is starting in a few weeks (May 2).

I had my site visit at St.Boniface Hospital yesterday. I met with the unit manager, found out who my preceptors will be for the first part and had a meeting with my faculty advisor. I have SO MUCH to refresh and learn before I start!!! Oh my goodness!!!! I hardly remember any of my
L & D stuff from second year! That was so very long ago!

I'm spending my first 6 weeks on LDRP and my second on L & D (high risk area). It should be an incredible learning experience and really hands-on compared to second year!

So, I'm really excited, and since my site visit, quite nervous about starting!!! It is going to be great!

Jumping over puddles hand in hand......

Ahhhh....love.........
Shane and I just arrived back at our appartment after a nice little date this evening! He wanted to take me out for a date... a little bite at Moxie's.

Unfortunately I got home a lot later than I had expected today and didn't know that he had these intentions! I was rushing home and wanted to take the faster route. Well, it ended up being the route with all the puddles! I was stuck in the field-like area behind our appartment surrounded by water. I could walk all the way back or just go straight into the water, hoping that it wasn't very deep! So, I went for it in my hurry.....and boy do I have a super wet shoe! I hope it dries before tomorrow when I need its services again!

When I arrived home I found out Shane's intentions, we decided to take a walk to the mall and have ourselves a little date! We looked around for a grad dress for me, but didn't really find anything. Then we enjoyed a bite to eat at Moxie's, some great conversation and hand-holding, eye-gazing from across the table.

Again I repeat, "ahhhhh......love......"

A highlight of my evening was the discussion we had at Moxie's. I love discussing our future, marriage, lives, what God is doing in us, etc. It is so exciting, sometimes challenging, but not usually boring! I have an incredibly great husband. I am so glad that I married him.

And now for the sweetest highlight......I was wearing flip flops for the first time this year and was getting pretty wet feet from the still-present puddles on the sidewalks. So, Shaner gave me a piggy back ride over the puddles to spare my feet from the water!!! That tickled my heart!

How sweet!

As the world weeps....

Today I am heartbroken. As I looked at the update on Terri Schiavo today, I began to cry. Terri Schiavo is dead as of this morning. Is life not sacred any longer? How far will we go to make the world convenient for those that have a voice? What about those that don't?

I weep for the ones that have no voice. I weep for the millions and billions of babies that have been denied life. I weep for those that have been murdered. I weep for those, like Terri, who have been treated less than human. People wouldn't even starve their pets to death, let alone a human being.

And yet, so many are confused with issues related to life and death. Being trained in a health profession has created some confusion for me as well. But I know that God has created life and He is the one who gives us breathe and takes it away. Why must human beings think that they have the right to take something so sacred into their own hands? And whose standards say what kind of life is worth living and which ones should be terminated?

OH GOD!!!!!!! OH GOD!!!!!!!! I CRY OUT FOR YOUR MERCY! WHEN WILL YOU COME???? WHAT CAN WE DO AS YOUR PEOPLE TO FIGHT FOR YOUR HEART AND YOUR WILL ON THIS EARTH????

So, I urge all of you to pray for Terri's family. And even more, I urge you to interceed and call out for the Kingdom and Will of God to be done on earth as it is in heaven. People we must pray as the times continue. There is much to stand in the gap for.

Tomorrow is Easter sunday and a few of us are doing a dance at church...

I don't usually get too nervous, but for some reason, I've got butterflies about this one. I don't really like that feeling! I've had quite the energy for this piece and as the practice and actual day have come closer I've been feeling a little nervous, excited and all the skipping heart feelings that accompany those types of emotions! It is sort of strange to be feeling these things! I almost feel a little stressed!

I pray that things run smoothly at our final run-through before church starts tomorrow. I pray that everything technical totally goes off without a hitch. I pray that everyone shows up...and on time. I pray that I have some balance for the parts that I do....I'm having a little trouble wobbling lately! I pray that each dancer involved takes ownership of their place in revealing the Bride of Christ to the rest of the observers and personally in their own lives. I pray that our movement and message is totally sparkled with the power of the Holy Spirit and that it gives off what God has planned for our hearts and time together tomorrow morning!

I must calm my heart and get some sleep! Sweet dreams and restful sleeps!

Here we are....Good Friday....

What an incredible day in our histories. This day is a monumental one in our lives as Christians. I love thinking about Jesus and the things He has done as my family heritage. Because it is!!! And I'm incredibly excited that all the future things He will do are my heritage and inheritance too! I can claim it for myself, because He gave it to me and paid the price for me to have it!

We watched The Passion for housegroup last night in the comfy couch room turned movie theatre (thanks to Cliff!). I love to be reminded about what Jesus did for me. At certain points in the movie, I found myself getting so mad at those religious leaders and Roman soliders who were on the front lines of beating and betraying Jesus. I really found that I had to look at the big picture of what Jesus was doing for the whole world or I could just be mad at the injustice of that one day and those few that were physically involved.

When you see the accounts of what happened on Good Friday so very long ago, it is almost difficult to figure out how you fit. This sounds silly because I have known from the beginning of my little life that Jesus died for my sins as well as everyone elses. As I was watching the movie last night I was thinking, "How do I fit into this story? What is the connection between my sins in 2005 and a Jewish man's death over 2000 years ago?". Without the eyes of my heart open and trusting in what God has said in His Word, it doesn't seem to make much sense to the average observer. I think I also was processing in this way because I had a small discussion about the movie with a friend at school earlier that day. She can't make it to mass this evening so she was planning on watching The Passion as her good deed of the day (she actually used these words...though being somewhat joking). So, while I was watching The Passion I was sort of thinking about her at some points and praying that the reality of what Jesus did would shine through this movie and touch her heart in a real way. That it wouldn't be just a movie or a story that isn't that important, but that it would change her entire world and perspective!!!!

So with faith I see the connection. With regular eyes it doesn't make much sense how the two connect, my life now and Jesus 2000 years ago. But I trust and believe that Jesus died for the sins of the world, and that includes mine. And I have the hope and the presence of the Holy Spirit to show me that it isn't just the past. That He is here with me today. That the Word of the Lord is active and living. That there is an incredible future instore!

I feel very intimately about Good Friday and what Jesus did for me. But I have such excitement about what happened 3 days later! (we'll get to that in a few days!).

Today I want to ponder about the sacrifice that Jesus was for me. I want to think about the intimate deed that He did. It is so beautiful.

"I feel good...dadadadadada......I knew that I would!"

I just arrived back from butts and guts at the Y...boy was that a work-out! I have been such a slacker and not going to the gym very often these past few weeks! But, wednesday nights are designated to butts and guts with my friend Crystal. It is so nice to have someone to go with because it gives you extra motivation to make yourself actually go each week! And it gives you someone to groan with throughout the class!

So, now I feel that my body is worked.......so I should really be working my brain and studying for my exam tomorrow....especially since it is worth 40% and I haven't yet studied today!!! It is almost 8pm...my dad is planning on stopping by for a short visit....and I like to go to bed by 10pm.....THAT DOESN'T LEAVE MUCH TIME!!!! And here I am blogging of all things!

But, I must say, I procrastinated LIKE CRAZY last week when I had 3 exams....and got the best marks yet! It was pretty incredible....I may have to use procrastination as my studying plan! It worked like a charm last week!

Oh...well...I should at least do a little! Gotta brush up on my personality disorders! See ya later!

Not feeling so hot......

I've been feeling yucky the last few days...and I think I've had a wee too much pain relievers in the past 24 hours or so! I finally got on top of the pain and wham! I'm sitting in my third class of the day and suddenly feel wiped out. My head was so heavy, like a bowling ball, my fingers were tingling and I needed a nap badly! I'm feeling a bit better by now....but then my feet started tingling at the bus stop on my way home! This is NOT good! I am not a fan of pain meds.....and then this happens! I didn't go over the amount the bottle said I could take! Oh well, this too shall pass!

As for date night last friday! I came home to take Shaner on the date and found flowers for me on the table! And a sweet "Just because I love you" card! A dozen beautiful roses! And since I didn't have a nice vase that would hold that many flowers, they are sitting beautifully in a beer glass! How romantic, eh?

We had a really nice supper at Pasquale's on Marion....a little quaint Italian restaurant. It was nice to gaze across the table and chat! It was like we were all young and dating again! (hee hee! that wasn't that long ago! and we really are still young!)
I'm generally pretty much on top of things, but I slipped up and forgot/just didn't book a bowling lane earlier that day. Work was super busy for me that day, strangely! So, since the everyone and their dog goes bowling on friday night in Winnipeg, we were out of luck! It was even packed for mini golf!
So, to end the evening, we dropped by the in-laws and chatted for a little while! And then headed home for some sleep! Ahhhh....I love sleep!

Speaking of sleep.....I think I need some!!

Tonight is DATE NIGHT!!!!!

I'm home for a quick lunch before I walk back to work. But, I just had to blog that tonight is date night with my hubbie!!! I asked him out earlier this week and he accepted the proposal of a night on the town with a mysterious woman....his wife! I'm definitely not mysterious! More like a complete open book for those that know me fairly well!!!

So, I would tell of our events, but I just can't!!! See it is a suprise for the hubbie and he may look on the blog before the night begins! So, I'll let you know how much fun we had tomorrow!!!

Enjoy the last friday of winter (technically)!!!

3 down, 1 to go!

Well, I finished the school week of 3 exams this afternoon! I only have 1 more next week and then a few weeks of nothing due, except one last paper, before my last set of exams!!! My last set of university exams for my whole degree! That is a wonderful thing!

My day off yesterday ended up being quite wonderful! I was expecting to stay home all day, minus the gym in the evening, but my plans changed a little! Shane gave me a call at lunch time and asked if I wanted to join him in the car as he drove around delivering some phones for work. I went along for the company dressed in my pjs without having showered or even washed my face yet that day! But, heck, I was only going to be sitting in the car with my hubbie! Then, Shaner decides he wants to have lunch together! Ahhh.....greasy as ever and not wearing appropriate clothing for the public! So, I decided to live a little and we dined at McD's......generally fairly disgusting...but a nice quick date, and pj's were fairly acceptable!

So, back to the books to cram for the 2 exams I had left. I accomplished a fair amount that afternoon....at least what I had left of it! So, after the gym I was going to get lots more done! Did I?????

Peer pressure by the husband caused me to abandon the books and dive into the world of superheros as facilitated by "The Incredibles". Such a cute movie and we really enjoyed ourselves! I was kicking myself a little at 10:30pm when I hadn't studied at all that evening!!!

Oh well, it's over, they're written. And the weekend is almost here!

ahhhhhh......

Well, I got great news yesterday that class today is cancelled! That never happens! So, it happens to be the wednesday morning that I don't work.....So......NO SCHOOL OR WORK!!!! I actually get a day in the middle of the week to stay home ALL DAY!!!! I can't remember that ever happening with classes!

I got to sleep in until 9am...then got up! I have two exams tomorrow, so it's not really a day off, but it feels like it! I'm going to start chili for supper, study, perhaps clean my house for study breaks, worship, and then go to the gym for butts and gutts this evening! I'm really looking forward to my day!!!

I've been processing humility and boldness lately.

I feel somewhat charged with what God is speaking to me. I feel the urge to be confident and bold and say things as they are. This hasn't always been the case with me. When I started dating Shane 4 and a half years ago (as of this week), I began to learn more and more through him, work and life about being more assertive. It also helped that I worked at a day program for mentally-challenged adults and had to learn quickly about enforcing boundaries and limits.

On the other hand I am really challenged to have a heart motivated by love and filled with humility. This was on my heart right after we got back from Kansas City and hasn't left me. Instead, the unit we started 3 or so weeks ago in a course I'm taking is.......yep......none other than.......HUMILITY.

I'm having quite the wrestle learning what God's definition is of humility. I don't want to be a proud person or one that is motivated by position/recognition....or anything like that. But, I also don't want to remain silent, be worried about offending people or beat around the bush. I'm tired of everyone's offenses and the fact that truth just can't, or isn't, being spoken.

So, Lord, create in me a heart motivated by Your love and that is filled with Your humility. Give the confidence in You to speak the message that You have called me to without any hinderences.

"Truth that comes by revelation always produces change; it always leaves us less sure of ourselves, more dependent on God, and more loving towards others" - Francis Frangipane

I delivered my first baby last night.

Hee hee! That is a shocking way to start a blog, eh?

Well, I dreamt that I started my senior practicum last night. And within my first shift I delivered a baby! (In reality, would NOT be the case) There is a strange part though that is open to interpretation....

I knew that the time for delivery was fast approaching and that if I wanted the potential chance of delivering this baby, I had better get some gloves! So, I reached over to get some gloves and when I looked back the baby's head was already crowning. So, looking back.....the head was originally coming first...like normal.

Well, as the delivery quickly progressed, I realized that I ended up delivering the baby feet first! (In real life here on earth, that position is not allowed!) I pulled on one of the baby's legs during the delivery. I remember thinking what I was doing was strange!

Then, when the baby was fully into this world, I took a look at her and checked her out and all. She was really tall/long and very mature for a baby! Like she wasn't really a baby by the look in her eyes.

Anyways, I thought about the dream this morning...thinking it was neat that I had delivered a baby in my dream! But, when I thought about it a little more and realized that different positions of the birth, I wondered if there was some significance......I don't know....

Dreams, dreams and more dreams.....

I've been dreaming a lot this last week.....about every night to every other night. It is becoming more and more frequent.

I had the weirdest thing happen! I had a dream about this cult-like group. I was driving my bug (car...I don't actually have one) and saw a car coming my way down what I thought was a road. This all took place in Winnipeg, around Confusion Corner. So, I, assuming it was a public road, started to drive down it as well. Well, that was a big mistake, because it was private property of this cult. They were.....mmmm....I could probably say sexual offenders and into a heck load of sexual immorality. The bizarre part was that I found out their name...and it was very specific. They were called "The JB (abbreviated) girls only club"....except that they had brought two guys into their group. I ended up talking with one of the guys who was planning on leaving the cult soon. I think he was a Christian at one time and knew that the "activities" that these members were participating in was wrong.

So, for the next two days I looked up JB on the internet to see what I could find.
Day #1 - I found:
- 17 year old boy that had died
- professional bull rider
- photographer
- baseball player

Shane even looked up "serial killer JB"....nothing.

So, Day #2, I looked up JB with a different last name thinking I may have gotten the last name a little wrong. Nothing really could be found. Then I thought, I'd attempt Shane's searching tactic and typed in "sex offender JB".......

There is one! A picture and all of him.......living in LA.

Now is that bizarre or what? .......I have no idea what that means!

Oh, if only to long.......

I am thinking today about how I long for food. When I see something that I crave, smell a wonderful food aroma or just think about the wonderful stuff, I feel a longing in my stomach and in the heart-area to partake of food. Both when I am hungry and when I am just desiring a specific type of food, I long for it. It is such a strong longing and desire that comes from within. Your tongue starts to get a little tingly and the salivation gets going in a greater way! It can be really tough to ignore those thoughts and feeling and not give your body what it craves.

I was thinking about this at the bus stop on the way home from University today. I want to long like that for Jesus. In a way that naturally comes from within. Whether I feel hungry or full, I still want to crave more! I want that body and heart longing and desire for Jesus. If we are created to long for Him, even greater than food, than something is mixed up here.

......and so I continue to discover more about fasting and longing........

I'm being stirred up.....and I think I may spin off into the heavens.....

"And I will sing the songs that awaken the dawn,
And I will usher in your appearing,
It's your face that I crave,
And it's your presence that I long for....."

On my walk to back to work this afternoon, I listened to Misty Edwards, a worship leader from Kansas City IHOP (on cd). I thought I may lift off the earth with the feeling that surrounded me. I had such a strong desire to dance on the sidewalk, but was quickly on my way back to work, that my arm was making circles beside me.....if my whole body couldn't dance at that moment, my arm was going to anyways!

I haven't blogged about my time in Kansas City yet, because I haven't had the words, or the time to sit and type. I don't know how to sum it all up. As seems to be the common theme of bloggers that went to IHOP, I am having a difficult time articulating as well!

I am challenged with the revelation of Jesus Christ.
I am overcome with the emotion that He can bring.
I am being drawn on a divine romance.
I am fascinated with the One I'm following.
I am so very curious about all the many facets of Jesus that I don't yet know.
My box of organization and control has once again been shaken.
I feel like my perspective has again been enlarged.
I feel like I've had a bit of fresh revelation of our Redeemer and Saviour.
I want to feed on the Word.
I want to medidate on the Scripture.
I want to study about our history, our present and our future as Saints.
I want to learn to sing the songs of the Lord.
I desire to flow in the Holy Spirit in a greater measure.

I really received a lot from the "meetings" we had with a few IHOPers. I was challenged to consider the future, the second coming of Jesus and being prepared. I was drawn to learn more about a fasted lifestyle. I was reminded of the gift that tongues can be. I enjoyed our time as a team, especially the fun moments and the intense 2 am prayer and prophetic times! I loved that! I felt a whole lot of anticipation about the present and the future. I feel excitement over were I am at and going and where our church is at and going as well!

There is so much I could say, and all the while, so little. So, more may leak out in the next few days...weeks.

"Take me with you. Come, let's run!" (Song of Songs 1:4)

Tomorrow....well, technically thursday....we leave for Kansas City....

My brain is thinking tomorrow night we leave....but it is technically an hour or two after wednesday is over and thursday has begun. I'm starting to think of what to pack and how to limit what I bring! I sure learned that the hard way on our honeymoon! Boy, did we have to pay extra on Sunquest Airlines for my stupid suitcase! That totally sucked!

I have a little prayer request for you all! I had this awful experience in junior high on the way home from camp. I had to pee so badly that I was bawling in the back of the bus. I even waddled to the front to beg the bus driver to let me pee in the bush (which is VERY unlike me! I don't like peeing in places other than the toilet generally!). He just would NOT stop for me and I think I'm realizing that that experience has had some lasting effects. I was thinking about the 14 hour (or whatever it is) drive that we have ahead of us....and started to internally panic yesterday night! I think it should be fine.....we are driving with people that care about not damaging one another.....but I'm still a little nervous!

Here are some of my ideas amidst the panic:
1. buy some depends for the trip and go whenever I have to
2. bring along a child's potty and just go in the van....in front of the rest of the van members....when nature calls!
3. this one is not a joke...i'm planning on doing it.....dehydrate myself all day wednesday and thursday so that I have less to eliminate!

So, yes, it is amazing the phobias that you may realize at different points in your life! Guess I need some prayer for this one!

Off for a drive I go....

I'm quickly showering and packing and then Shaner and I are off to Grand Forks for the night! It should be a nice time! Shane's work does their Christmas party quite late...after Christmas. So, this weekend is the end of the Christmas parties in a way! They are paying for our hotel room, with a king-size bed! And they are taking us all out for a nice dinner tonight! I think it should be a fun time! And the weather makes for a bright and fun day to be travelling.

So, sorry we won't be seeing you church-people tomorrow morning! Keep up the pressing in while we are gone....and we'll be back to worship with you at Encounter God Night tomorrow!

Adios amigos!