The end of a year and the beginning of a new one!

I love New Year's Eve. I'm big on beginnings and endings and so I love the last day of the year. I journal and reflect on the highlights...good and bad...of the previous year and all the things that I accomplished and all the firsts. Then I think about the upcoming year and what it may hold, what I want it to look like and some goals or themes for myself..which are usually spiritual.

Shane and I are celebrating the New Year here in Kansas City! We leave early tomorrow morning with a very long drive back! And I'm not too excited because I have to drive the entire 14 hours back. I did it on the way here...mostly to have bragging rights that I could drive the whole trip. But I was expecting to sleep some on the way back because each night here is full of great conversation with Shane and Joyska which makes for very late nights! Oh well! At least Shane and I now know that I can do the whole trip and therefore we can come out just the two of us, no problem!

The conference has been really good! Lots of incredible worship, and great teachings. It is incredibly intense and so we've had to pick and chose some of the sessions we want to go to. We'd wear ourselves out way to fast otherwise!

It has been so nice to hang out with Joyska too! She has been so generous to let us stay over at her place! We've had some fun and yummy times at Panera Bread, Cold Stone and of course, our McDonald's drive thru experiences late at night! Bless you Joyska for your generous heart! We've enjoyed your presence over the last few days!

So, it is late already (in the afternoon) and I need to shower so that we can head out to the solemn assembly. It is worship and prayer from 2 until midnight. I'm looking forward to hearing an hour of Tim Hughes. I think it will be good! I'm getting ready to pray! Heck, if they open up the mic and I feel led, maybe I'll pray in the KC Convention Centre! We're going to head back to Joyska's, as is the present plan, to bring in the New Year together!

See you all back in Manitoba!

Merry Christmas!

So, it is Christmas today. I just got home, kissed my husband and wished him a Merry Christmas and had some breakfast after working the night shift. So, I was able to have many hours of Christmas already...unlike normal people that probably are still sleeping and haven't even woken up to Christmas yet. Our sweet charge nurse brought Christmas socks in for each of us that were working! And we had a yummy Christmas potluck. It was a really nice night actually! I had my delivery of the night earlier in the evening while it was still Christmas Eve. Then just helped out others and did break relief for the rest of the night!

As a child, we always celebrated Christmas on Christmas Eve. I'm guessing that's why I find it feels more like Christmas when it is dark outside. When I was walking past the big windows that display the city and its' lights at the hospital during the night, it was special to me that I was awake in the wee hours of Christmas morning.

I didn't mind working Christmas this year. The shift was good and I haven't minded the idea of working Christmas. It was just a little sad to leave the festivities and head to work last night. I went to the in-laws' for Christmas munchies and got to see the family with Shaner for a little while. I felt a little like Eyeore....a little droopy and a little sad. It was mostly just for the ride to the hospital and the walk into the building. Then I got myself pep-talked into a better attitude.

Shaner and I are planning on sleeping the day away. We aren't really doing anything for Christmas this year here at our place. We'll probably eat something together for supper before I head back to work tonight. But otherwise, no presents to open from each other. It may seem strange, but I also think it is a good opportunity. It is probably some life lesson about our values about the real meaning of Christmas. We, generally speaking, say that Christmas is not about the presents. Well, at least for other years, we can look back at a our second Christmas as a married couple and say that we put our words into action. It really isn't about the presents but when you don't have them, you realize what a big part of the holiday they seem to be. It is both relieving/freeing and slightly too bad not to have presents for each other this year. It is a good experiment though.....

So, merry Christmas to you all. Enjoy the day....however you do that.

And happy birthday, my Jesus. I love you and I'm thinking about you.

Such wonderful news!!!!

Due to a very generous, anonymous person, Shane and I are going to Kansas City next week after all!

When we took our car in the other week and got new brakes and 4 new tires, we cancelled our trip to KC for December. We were disappointed, but had peace about not going. By that I mean that we weren't whining and pining for the trip. But, deep down both of us just couldn't believe that we weren't going. Shane thought that somehow we just might be going after all. I kept thinking that, but didn't know how that was at all possible. We didn't really verbalize that too much to each other, but just accepted that it looked like we weren't going.

Well, somebody approached us with a wad of cash to cover the trip and said that he/she wanted us to be able to go after all! After refusing the blessing twice, we accepted! And with joy! I'm totally pumped to be able to go to One Thing next week!

So, Shaner and I get to go to KC together again! We also get to be a part of a pretty great-sounding conference! 10,000 young adults! Incredible worship leaders and speakers! Fill me with knowledge and let me worship!

We'll be gone for 6 days and get to stay with our friend, Joyska! We've never stayed at her place before! I look forward to good times and good eats (here we come Panera Bread!).

And.....when we get back to Winnipeg, I'm working quite a bit and will be in Manitoba for 5 days before heading south to Puerto Rico with my sister for 9-10 days! It is holiday time for me! And what a blessing that both trips were totally taken care of! Otherwise they would have been impossible for us!

Thank-you Lord for your provision and blessings! He totally blessed us!

Ravenously hungry....

I think my spirit man is ravenously hungry today. I feel something pretty strong inside like an emotional craving or something. It is both very annoying because I automatically want to satisfying it easily and quickly, but also very good because I know that it is right. It is what I want my spirit to be doing! Longing after God!

The tough part is walking towards filling it. Having motivation to spend part of the day in prayer, read a bunch of the Word, rest in His presence. When I'm doing these things, I know they were exactly what I needed to do Strangely, everything in me tries to do other things instead of the very things that will satisfy and the very thing I was made to do. I hate the irony of that.

I just awoke and I'm already hungry in the spirit. I guess I better get to cooking......

Can you believe it?

Yesterday was the first 12 hour shift that I've ever done on LDRP when NO ONE, not one, came in in labor the entire day. That was totally not the usual.

At the beginning of the morning, we had a full board (all our rooms taken) minus 2 or so. We had so many discharges that by the time I left at 7:30pm, there was 5 patients left....and 5 nurses. I had 2 patients and their babies! When normally I have 4-5 moms plus their babies!!!! I was pretty unbelievable!

This is my theory: Being the last saturday before Christmas, everyone wanted to get to their Christmas parties, gatherings, finish shopping, etc. so instead of coming in with a hint of anything (labor, feeling sick, etc.) they toughed it out all day as to join in with the festivities. When these ladies go home at night after being up and about all day, eating lots, etc. that's when things will hit. That's when their aching bodies have time to rest and their brains have time to think. So, I'm off to work in the next 20 minutes and we'll see if my theory is correct. We'll see...

In the meantime, I got offerred to take another LOA last evening. That is always really nice, but Shane and I didn't have plans and we need the hours/money, so I declined. It was a nice evening to be there!

Yesterday, today and tomorrow...

I actually did 8 out of the 10 things to do on my list from yesterday. The only things I didn't do was the dishes and talk with the insurance guy! The day was full and fun! I really did enjoy the movie...Narnia....whatever they called it....The Lion, the witch and the wardrobe. I didn't have very high expectations and so I really enjoyed it!

Also, the neurologist put Shane on a new drug yesterday. The "new kid on the block" according to our doctor. He isn't allow to put just anyone on this drug, according to Pharmacare. We get to try it out because we're trying our fourth drug already! The bummer is that it is expensive! I joked with Shane in the car about the fact that we should get sponsered for our medical bills. It really isn't that bad at all! It is just a little stressful when you add more to the financial list! But, if it works, and doesn't cause icky side effects, I'll be so thankful!

As for today, I worked a 12 hour shift on Labor and Delivery. It was a nice day. And I actually still had the energy to do some grocery shopping afterwards!

Tomorrow, I'm back to the hospital again for shift 2 out of 3 this weekend. I think it should be a pretty good weekend.

Strangely, I'm kinda looking forward to working over the Christmas weekend.....I must be psycho! It is kinda special to be with patients on Christmas...especially those celebrating a special time in their lives such as an addition to their families! And to top it off, I get to take a family member with me over the wee hours of Christmas Eve!! My little sis (well, I guess that isn't exactly true...my mature, beautiful, adult sister) is coming to hang with me over a 12 hour night shift to job shadow me! We get to spend the whole shift together! I've requested that we be placed on one of the labor floors so that Steph can hopefully see her first delivery! That would be special! I want to see her watch her first birth! That is special for me too! It may be a little strange too...as my nursing role is a role that Steph hasn't seen me in before. None of my loved ones really...minus Christina as we were in clinical together. I'm really looking forward to having that shift together!

Well, I'm going to do a little vegging and reading before I hop into bed for a good night's sleep....maybe a warm bath would be nice......

Morning to you all!

Today is a sleep-in day for me and I actually got up at 9:30! That is pretty early for my sleep-in days! I wanted to get a bunch done today and not feel rushed.
Also, I woke up with a sore throat. Yucky! It wasn't sore yesterday when I saw the doctor! We'll watch and see what it wants to do.

So, on the agenda for today:
1. have breakfast

2. have some God time

3. do the dishes with Shane

4. ask Shane how the exam went (he's writing it as I type and it's his last one!!!!)

5. go to the gym this morning (we renewed our membership for the year yesterday....got an even better deal on it than last year! Thank-you Lord for the membership assistance program! Oddly, the girl that looked over all my finances and gave us the deal is a Christian, used to go to the Vineyard and now is aware of the House of Prayer due to our conversation! Small world!)

6. pop by the hospital to hand in my RN registration (it finally came! I've waited so long! Now I get a raise right in time for the Christmas time and a half hours! Yippee!)

7. have a nice belated birthday coffee with Christina! The warm drink should feel nice on the throat too! And coffee with Christina is always nice! Something we are trying to do regularly as we both work strange shift work, unlike most people we know.

8. talk with our insurance guy

9. pop by the neurologist...too many yucky side effects with the newest drug Shane's been on (since the end of October). We're going to try and start something new today! I'm SO THANKFUL!!!

10. movie with housegroup friends this evening! We're going to see Naria on the big screen! It will be fun to go out with th0se guys! Also, I had only heard the story once in grade 3 so I quickly read it last week. Now I'm up to date on the storyline!

So, when I map it out like that, it's a full day!!! I'm happy that I got up at a good hour to do all these lovely things! So, off I go to make a phone call or two and start the list! Honey Nuts Cheerios, here I come!

Just thinking about the physical response of crying....

Crying is a bit of a bizarre reaction. Tears flowing from your eyes, your nose getting involved and either running or plugging up, and your face scrunching up in a funny look. All of this really affecting your ability to speak or appear normal in public.

Yet, after you cry, there is such a feeling of relief. Strange, how a physical reaction that often comes from an emotional source, creates such emotional relief.

I tend to find myself a little on the teary side lately. And often at inopportune times, such as a work. I can always feel it coming on and it is really hard to stop the tears from coming and prevent my voice from giving it away. I always try to talk myself out of crying when I'm at work. Sometimes it works a little, other times, not at all. I had a teary experience yesterday and stated to the nurse I was talking with "I always cry at the most inopportune times!". That was the truth, but it was also a nice way to break the ice! It made us both laugh.

I do wonder what my tears and wailing do to the heart of my Father. I wish I really knew how much He loves me. I wish I really knew how my tears affect the feelings in His heart. I can't believe that when He is with me when I'm fighting tears at work, or allowing myself to wail in the car, that He is without compassion. He must feel a lot. I wish I had a glimpse of that revelation in my heart.

Well, crying is a healthy response. Jesus did it too.

HAPPY 23RD BIRTHDAY, CHRISTINA!!!

Today is my friend, Christina's, birthday. Birthdays are a big deal to her. She always feels a little strange around birthdays, processing the whole thing of aging. I think it may be getting easier for her over the years.

C - caring girl; Christina cares about those she loves. She is pretty thoughtful about the little things. She sends care packages to those she loves that are farther away. She usually remembers to ask you about small things that you previously mentioned...she's got a good memory.

H - helpful; Christina is a helpful girl. That is obvious in the profession that she has chosen and the way in which she cares to serve her patients. Christina has helped out with rides many occasions!

R - responsible; Christina is a pretty responsible girl. She has been out on her own and away from her family/parents for many years already. That required her to be very responsible. She's good with the resources that she has. She's also a reliable friend.

I - irreplaceable; Christina is irreplaceable. There is no one else like her. No one else with the same gifts, talents and quirks. She is uniquely herself.

S - sassy; Christina is a little sassy. Not in the way of speach, but in her "daring" side. She loves to pose (as you have probably seen in the pictures occasionally posted on her blog). You should see this girl salsa!

T - teachable; Christina has a very teachable spirit. She is willing to learn new things all the time. She has a tender heart that wants more and more of what God has for her.

I - interesting; Christina is interesting. She has good things to share with others. She has lots to offer. It is a good time hanging out with Christina. I love the times we have together!

N - nice; Christina is genuinely nice. She speaks well of people. She speaks kindly to people.

A - admirable; Christina is admirable. She is pursuing God in a way that is a good example to others around her. I admire the way she is desiring the things of God in her life in a real and true way.

Happy Birthday, my friend! It has been so nice to get to know you over the years, as roommates, nursing students, friends, and sisters in Christ! I hope to get to know you even more as we get older and have many more years of friendship!

Morning!

Yesterday had ups and downs.

Baking with mom was great! I am looking forward to the day when Steph doesn't work every week day and can join us in holiday baking! The babies were home and I got to give lots of loving, rock Vivi to sleep, give Caden kisses. Strangely, I don't seem to remember how to spell my foster brother's name! And I got to see my bro....who was very helpful in the afternoon, as he ran out and did errands for the bakers! Thanks Shaun!

As per the downs, the car needed a whole bunch of stuff done to it. Brakes, new tires, etc. Therefore, it equalled one whopping bill. And therefore the pre-trip inspection that we went there for, became a no-trip inspection. We will not be going to KC at the end of the month. No moula for that. We are disappointed but I'm ok with it. We hummed and hawed long enough in deciding that I was ok with either decision. We will enjoy the holidays here at home.

So, tonight I begin another round of night shifts. Only 2 this time. So today I hope to relax at home, hit the gym and then try to nap again this afternoon. See ya later!

Start up that oven, Mama! We're gonna do us some baking!

....off I go to Steinbach! Bright and early to get the car checked up at the dealers and to my mom's place! I pray that there isn't a lot that needs to be done with our car today! Please Jesus!

Christmas baking..... here we come!

Tomorrow morning I'm off to my mom's to bake some goodies for the season and our little Christmas party. We baked 5 different things last year. This year we are just choosing our favorite 3 from last year. We're not going overboard! It should be fun!

I had such a nice evening with my sister! Shane and I went over to see her new place and have supper with her. That was nice! Then Steph and I went to the Y together to get Steph hooked up with a pass and get her acquainted with the gym. It is going to be SO nice to have a gym partner again! I had a friend I went to some classes with (ie. butts and gutts) last winter, but she cancelled her membership and moved into the country. I've missed having a partner! Now I can hang with my sister, have a gym partner and having somebody with me will make me want to go to aquafit in the evening when I can! It will feel like a social outing! We ended our lovely evening with yummy eggnog steamers and a cozy time relaxing in Steph's new bedroom! She gave me a great wrist/forearm massage! That sounds pretty strange, I know. I've had such sore wrists in the past 3-4 days with work. My sister's massage gifting is one of the best-kept secrets! Oops.....guess I just made that one public knowledge!

I just finished working my 3 12 hour night shifts over the weekend. It sure feels like I fall off the scene during my working weeks/weekends. I'm ok with that though. It's all good. I think it is a maturing thing for me to not be able to make everything that I want to. It's good for me (though I don't always want to think so).

I'm soon off for bed....haven't slept in the nighttime since thursday night! I don't think it will be a problem! Except that I'm pretty awake and feel like doing stuff....and can't sleep in tomorrow!

I suppose it's back to the working world......

Because I wasn't at work on sunday (feeling yucky), I have been off for a week. It has been so nice! So, tonight is back to the working world. For 5 12 hour night shifts in the next week! Yikes! You practically eat, sleep and breathe work. It will be good to get back in the swing of things. I'm always a little nervous going back....especially after a nice break of a week!

I love the weeks off that I get. Especially at home with my husband. I go for coffee with friends. I make plans. I sleep in with Shane. We snuggle and watch Dr. Phil together. We go grocery shopping in the middle of the day. I go to the Y. We have a lot of relaxing time in our home....reading books, having God time. And I have the time to make good, hearty suppers.

Life is pretty sweet on my week off. It is during those weeks that I wonder what I would do if I had to be at work every day like regular people. It doesn't leave any time for anything! And then I tend to focus a little too much on work all the time...and my perspective is a little different than I'd like it to be. I sure like the perspective I can focus on when I have a whole lot of time to invest in reading the Word, prayer, listening to worship, etc. Your perspective is different when you surround yourself with these things....which is possible on my weeks off. I definitely see the diffference.

So, today I will go to the Y, hopefully set up the Christmas tree with Shaner and then take a nap before I join the owls working the night shift at the hospital tonight! Enjoy your weekends....mine is coming to a close as yours are beginning!