Human Trafficking

Over the last 1-2 years this issue has gripped my heart more and more. My understanding of it and heart for it is still developing but I find myself feeling strongly about this topic these days. I said to Shane yesterday, it makes my heart sad that I can't gather each of these girls in my arms and hug them.

This last week and a bit has been pretty intense. I'm preparing to speak at Sanctuary this evening on this topic, as a information-type talk about why we as a house of prayer should pray. We gotta be informed on the things we are praying for, right?!

That being said, I've spent at least 6 hours in front of the computer over 3 days working on my notes and 16+ hours at a conference over 2 days solely discussing the topic of human trafficking. It's been an intense week.

Amazingly, I've only dreamt about it once, the night after day 1 of the conference. This is a terrible topic to dream about and I pray that the Lord would wash me after big chunks of time are committed to researching, learning or praying about the issue. My sleep has been slightly affected this week, but not too bad.

The last few days my focus hasn't been on this topic, which is probably a good thing after a week of intensity. I had to work 2 night shifts and then spent the evening with my family yesterday.

When diving into the issue of human trafficking, I think you need to be so careful to balance it correctly. Sometimes the things I hear make me want to go out on a mission and save the world! Other times, they make me feel a little more helpless that nothing I do is going to change things.

I HAVE to keep giving the burdens of this world back to Jesus. Yes, I feel compelled to do something. The best thing I can do is pray about it. Releasing it back to the One who can move mountains is the best move I can make. Carrying it WITH Him and taking on ONLY what He gives me is a very smart move. I need to balance the study of this topic with time soaking in His presence and meditating on who He is and His love for me.

Last week, after a full day with 2 different meetings on this issue, I had an evening planned with the girls. When I said this to one of the people I met with to talk about human trafficking, she stressed the need to remember to take care of myself while learning more about this topic. She said a girls night after a full day thinking about human trafficking was a great idea!

So, if you think of me tonight, could you say a little prayer? I hope the speaking goes smoothly and that I say the things that are on the Lord's heart. I could talk for hours with the information I've received in the last few weeks but I need to know the key points to hit tonight. Pray that our hearts are gripped with the things that grip the heart of God!

How Long, Oh Lord?

Tonight, I'm feeling the ache a little more than usual for a corporate house of prayer that would be found before the Lord day and night in the city of Winnipeg.

Tonight was supposed to be Nightwatch, but it got canceled this morning. I am very disappointed. Strangely, more disappointed than I expected.

How long will it be until there is a place where I can go to sit before the Lord anytime of day or night, to steal away from regular life and encounter Him in the midst of unceasing prayer and worship? How long will it be before there is a place established that allows this in Winnipeg?

Generally, I haven't been aching for it anymore. Sometimes the desire and dream of it seems so far away that I forget about it as a big picture. I don't want hope deferred because it makes my heart sick.

The Nightwatch has been refreshing to my spirit. I enjoy it. It brings me joy. I look forward to it and get happy at the thought of encountering the Lord in the middle of the night. I was excited to gather with the few people that come out and do it together. I was excited to sing. I was excited to focus on the Lord for a good few solid hours. I was excited to have the chance to lead a set.

Nightwatch being canceled tonight is not a big deal, but today it represents a bigger deal to me. Tonight I am disappointed because it just reminded me that there isn't a place where I can go whenever I want to and join others in my city, praying and worshiping before the Lord. Today it could make me cry because I am aware of what I want and what we don't have presently.

Oh Lord, how long?

Back to the Grind

Well, tomorrow I'm back to regular scheduled life. I'm working 12 hour days all weekend long. It's ok but I've had such a nice 11 days off that I really would enjoy another week!

It was nice to spend vacation time here in Manitoba this time around. We try to take a chunk of holidays once a year in the fall and visit our lovely American friends in Kansas City. It is wonderful to enjoy friends, the city of Kansas City and the prayer room! I'm already counting down the months until our Kansas City Family Vacation that Shane and I love!

This 11 day stretch was full of fun stuff and yet relaxing at the same time. We celebrated our anniversary with all kinds of things, got a manicure and haircut, went away for 2 nights, Shaun and I celebrated "Kristi Day", I had my second voice recital, we started Beach Mondays, and much, much more! It was full of fun and exciting events!

Yet, in the midst of all these things, there was a number of spontaneous events, which was fun! Shane and I have a full schedule between our work schedules, which include my nursing schedule and Shane's Sanctuary schedule. There isn't a lot of room for spontaneity and we don't mind that as we prefer to schedule anyways. Occasionally, it is a little fun to throw in spontaneity though! As for the last minute planning, I enjoyed an evening with my sister talking at the park and her place, attending the Sanctuary staff meeting, having a lunch date with my husband, seeing my sister's new office for the first time, going to the gym whenever we wanted, a very last minute BBQ at the in-laws, and more.

In the midst of the last 11 days, I have felt myself relax on the inside. I struggle with worry and anxiety at times. I can get stressed out about life, work and time.

I felt a considerable difference in myself this week. I feel relaxed on the inside. I feel more peaceful, even though I went out more than usual. I feel like I'm just getting the hang of vacation mode, but unfortunately I have to go back to work in the morning. I pray that the peace and simple pleasures that I'm feeling on the inside will transfer over to regular life. I hope that I go through the next 3 work days with a peace and calmness in my spirit that I often don't feel at my workplace due to the nature of the job.

I'm so thankful for the vacation time I get. I'm thankful for my work schedule that allows me 3 or 6 day stretches off during my regular rotation. I'm thankful that for this season my husband works from home most of the week, even though I'm greatly desiring that the Lord would change that and instead give Sanctuary a building. I'm thankful for the peace that He gives. I'm thankful that, with His help, joy can be found in the little things in life.

Kristi Day!

My sweet younger brother surprised me with a phone call a week or two ago, asking me on date! The plans were a surprise...not even Shane knew what we were doing!

All I knew was that I needed to be dressed in semi-formal wear and ready at 4:15pm yesterday. I was excited and very curious all week long!

Shaun arrived with flowers and my favorite Starbuck's drink (with all the right touches like solo and decaf and grande to boot!)! Then we headed out in his car. He took some side streets and such to throw me off =) We went for a walk at The Forks and then back into the car.



Shaun took me to Olive Garden (seeing as I love chains that have all the refills you'd like) and it was great! We had a 40-45 minute wait, but that was just part of the experience. The weather was awesome outside and we sat and talked the whole time we were waiting.

Then the food and company was superb as well! We ate until we were stuffed and had great conversation. It was so nice to spend some quality time alone with my brother!



After Olive Garden, Shaun took me to 7-11 for a slurpee and a few candies. I was stuffed!

We went back to my house and went I opened the door, I just had to laugh! It was so special! Shaun had gotten Shane to set up a game of Sequence on the living room floor, ready for us to sit and play a game together! Most of my family members do NOT like games, though I do. So, I knew it was a special effort and a personal touch for Shaun to play a board game with me! I was delighted!



We played Sequence and gave back rubs (which Shaun and I always swap) which was a great way to end "Kristi Day" (that's what Shaun called it). Shane and Steph joined us and the four of us enjoyed each other's company for a while before it was just getting too late to stay up longer.

I had a wonderful Kristi Day! I felt so loved! I really enjoyed the company of my little bro and think he's an awesome brother. It was so nice to talk and talk and talk with each other for 6 solid hours!

Thanks Shaun!

HAPPY 5TH ANNIVERSARY!

Today is officially our 5th wedding anniversary! We spent the last 2 nights away celebrating and I'll be sure to get pictures up another day. We had a nice time away and love celebrating the gift of marriage that the Lord has given us.

Today we woke up at the resort, had a nice brunch and packed up to leave, since check out was at noon. We were home by 12:30ish, because it is such a quick trip back to the city. A surprise gift awaited us from our dear sister! She's so sweet! Then, we unpacked and enjoyed all the happy anniversary messages =)



We exchanged cards this morning at breakfast and gifts later this afternoon. Shane got a playstation 3 game that he wanted and I got earrings!




This afternoon, Shane played his new game and I took a nice, long nap! Ahhhh....holiday life can be grand!

Because we are adults, we bypassed supper and went to BDI for ice cream instead! We went big this time and got the Goog and the Sleeping Beauty to finish off the anniversary week celebrations. The rain stayed away so we could have a nice walk over the bridge with our yummy supper =)

We're home now and relaxing. We looked at the wedding pictures to reminisce about June 12, 2004. It was the start of a very fun life together as a married couple!

Happy Anniversary my love!

Celebration Day #2

Celebration Day #2 began with the final voice lesson of the season. It was fun and we had our last practice before our little recital next Monday. Should be fun!

Then Shane and I drove out to Steinbach to get haircuts! I got some highlights to get into the summer mood. Shane and I left a lot of hair on that floor between the two of us =)

Here's the before shot..


And the after...thought I'm thinking it will look a little different when I do it myself tomorrow morning!


Then off to my mom's for some supper and laundry. It was a nice evening and we even took a walk to visit my grandma in the hospital and got in a game of Phase 10 with my mom!

I'm supposed to be packing but haven't started yet!

Celebration Day #1!

Today was Celebration Day #1 of the Anniversary Week!

After getting to bed late (2am), I accidentally slept in! Then I woke up and got ready to head out to Giselle's School for a french manicure! Just a plug for Giselle's School here. It was great and at a reduced price! Gotta love that!

I was at the manicure for an hour and a half and realized that I want to do that more often! My hands and wrists have been through the mill in the last 3 years and they take a lot day to day. My hands really are the slaves of my body =) They do a lot for me and I don't always treat them kindly! So, perhaps I will treat them to a bit of pampering a couple of times a year...especially if it's at a reduced rate =)



Then Shane and I headed over to Polo Park to try and find some glasses. Sadly, Shane has to get glasses for reading, computer time, etc. It's going to be different seeing him in glasses. All of our dating, engaged or married relationship, he's been glasses free, except for sunglasses (which he wears all the time). Now at the age of 28, he's getting some =(

The shopping went great! We were finished in 10-15 minutes with a pair that will look very classy on my hubbie! Thank-you income tax refund for supporting the glasses event and anniversary week!

To start off the week, we had a romantic supper at a restaurant we hadn't gone to before, Prairie Ink. It was really great! We enjoyed our meals, one another's company, and yummy gelati milkshakes to splurge!







It's been a great start to a week of romance =)

Holiday Time!

I just finished my weekend of nights Sunday morning and am happy to be starting 11 days of holidays! I slept during the day, then went to Sanctuary and now am not so much in the mood to sleep. So, at 12:15am, I thought I'd get up and do a few things!

I'm incredibly pumped over my June holidays. I've taken holidays in June for all the years that I've gotten vacation as a nurse, which is only since 2006. The reason for the holidays......is to celebrate our anniversary each year!

I was talking to Shane about celebrations last week and realized again how much I love celebrating good things, especially our anniversary. I love celebrating birthdays, yet getting another year older isn't a huge accomplishment since my length of time on the earth is out of my control. I love celebrating seasons and holidays though they are for everyone to celebrate and can be pretty generic.

My anniversary is special to me. And I've come to the conclusion that is it probably the occasion of the year that I want to celebrate the most. What an accomplishment! Each and every year that we are married is another great success.

It isn't just like gaining another year of life as with birthdays. It isn't another Christmas or Easter or Thanksgiving passing me by.

It is another 365 days of laughing, loving, forgiving, repenting, choosing, hugging, serving, receiving and growing. It means I've hopefully laughed more often, loved a little better, forgave a little easier, repented a little quicker, chose the better, hugged most or all of those 365 days, served with more love and patience, received more graciously and grown from the place I was 365 days earlier.

So, this week is a celebration in many ways! Today, after I get to sleep, I'm starting the celebration with a manicure! I've only had 1 since our wedding 5 years ago!

Cheers to holidays and another year of marriage!

Some Humor for You

I have a little story to share with you that caused me to laugh last weekend at 3:45am.

I worked the day shift all of last weekend, which means early rising at 5:30am. So, to prepare and not be totally exhausted, I go to bed early (9:30pm) and put in some ear plugs so that Shane can do whatever he wants to around the apartment without worrying about making too much noise.

On top of the ear plugs, I have my night guard in, because I tend to clench and grind my teeth at night. Such a pain in the butt!

About 3:45am, I started to stir. Apparently I had been dreaming of bubble gum or something and ended up with my left ear plug in my hand. I awoke when something just didn't feel right.

My ear plug was in my mouth and I was trying to chew my ear plug like I would bubble gum! Because of the texture and the feeling of the night guard, it just wasn't feeling right which was making me wake up!

How disgusting! I spit it out and thought about how gross that was. Then I realized how funny it was and had to have a little laugh before heading back to bed!

Oh the silly things that happen when you sleep!

As my co-workers said, at least it was my own ear plug!

The Next Few Days...

I'm looking forward to the next few days. Every 2 weeks I get a stretch of 6 days off in my work schedule. My favorite of the two stretches a month is when I'm coming off nights on a Friday morning and don't have to go back until days on the following Friday. I love that stretch!

And that is what I entered into on Friday morning! I woke up Friday evening, had a wonderful coffee with a good friend and then jumped into the Nightwatch, which was a blast!

I actually got to sleep in the night hours from Saturday to Sunday, but my sleep was terrible. I hadn't slept during the night since Tuesday night so I guess my body was pretty awake in the night time. But, I'm thankful to report this morning that I had an awesome sleep last night and feel happy and refreshed waking up this morning!

This week has a bunch of fun things planned! Today I have a shopping date with my little sis! I get to help her spend her money on clothes that she needs =) Then we're heading to the in-law's for a BBQ! Mmmm....I LOVE BBQs!

The rest of the week holds fun things like voice lessons, a prayer meeting, pedicures with my mom and sister, a massage, supper at a friend's, and date night! Those fun things along with some time at home with my husband and the Lord, make this stretch of 6 off very inviting!

Another Nightwatch!

Yes, I know I've been a slacker on the blogging lately. It seems there's not usually much that is new in my life to write about and the perfectionist in me sometimes has ideas about what to write about and then cans them if the thoughts aren't forming smoothly.

Yesterday in the wee hours of the morning, we had our third Nightwatch. It was fun! I'm lucky that the past 3 Nightwatches, I've already been on night mode due to work.

On the first one, there was lots of joy and a buzz in the place, being #1 and all. The second one had less of a buzz but I felt drawn to intimacy with Jesus as a theme. This third one combined both for me. I really had a lot of fun! I really enjoy praying, connecting and worshiping in the middle of the night together with a bunch of people! I also felt like there was grace for me to feel His presence and come close. It was awesome to hear Him a little more clearly..

There were a lot of smiles....that usually went hand and hand with a lot of clapping =) Pacing and clapping keeps you awake and engaged at 4 in the morning!

Again, I'm proud of our little band of Gideon's army. We had a new singer on the line and a new piano player. The time to learn and step out seems to be in the night. I also got to lead a devo, with an awesome team around me, and it was so fun! I don't lead on Sundays but the night time is when I get a chance, and it was fun!

These hours when the rest of the City sleeps really matter. We are sowing seeds into eternity as we engage with God solely because He's worth our hearts, love and attention, even at 3am. It really matters in the Spirit when we pray for the ending of human trafficking in the very hours where there is probably a lot of business happening on our very streets. It matters that we lift up our voices and pray for the ending of abortion across our nation at 4:30am. It matters that we align our hearts and pray for the Church across our city and ask for the Holy Spirit to pour out on all flesh at 2am.

Each hour and each minute that we agree with God, His Word and His plan, really matters, whether in the day or in the night. The nights have been really fun for me and have an excitement and buzz at this point in our history that I'm really enjoying!

Yesterday was the night, and today we're on in the day! Should be a good one!

My Wonderful Husband

I have a very special husband. I am so very thankful who the Lord picked for me to marry. What a wonderful choice!

My sweet husband blessed me yesterday. I was sitting on the couch, reading when he arrived home from an appointment. Much to my delight, he entered the apartment with a bouquet of flowers and a smile!!!!

I squealed with delight! I was in the mood lately for flowers and really was hoping for some =) I would have been more than satisfied by one lone flower. He's a "go big or go home" kind of guy, and so I got 17 in total! A dozen red roses and 5 tulips (my fav) to match! I have made many stops over the last two days to smell the roses, literally!



Then I had a massage, which I have waited for for a long time! Our benefits at work have been crappy over the last few years. They changed this month and I am so pumped to get massages again!

Then when I arrived home and prettied myself, Shane took me out for a surprise date! We went to Olive Garden for supper, which I had a desire for over the weekend that I mentioned just once, and my awesome husband heard that small request and made it happen! He rocks!

We enjoyed very yummy food and great conversation. I love the face to face connecting time!

Then we got some yummy, warm Starbuck's drinks with some gift certificates and headed to the park with some old bread for Shane's friends, the geese.





We love St.Vital Park in the spring, summer and fall! It is such a wonderful source of free entertainment! We walked, talked, fed the geese and looked at the flooding.




Look at the high river! Feet away in front of us was the river!




Thank-you Shane for a lovely date! I love you like crazy!

Could it be true?

"The more we fear to suffer, the more we need to do so" (Francois Fenelon)?

I've been realizing lately that I am fairly pleasure-seeking, which leads me to be fairly self-seeking. If life is tough, do whatever it takes to make it feel better. If things are uncomfortable, get away from the discomfort to a place that is more comfortable.

I was reading Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas this morning as my lovely sister was having her turn at voice lessons and really found myself identifying with the next chapter in the book. I don't feel these things specific to marriage but specific to the way I function in general in life.

I just don't like the hard stuff. I don't like those hard emotional days when I feel down. I don't like struggles. I don't like awkward moments (though I'm exceptional at being a part of them). I don't like working hard through things. I just want them to be easy. I want things to be comfortable. I want things to feel good.

Is that too much to ask?

Well, apparently, my desires are in the wrong place.

"Jesus promised us that everyone will be seasoned with fire, and every sacrifice will be seasoned with salt. The desire for ease, comfort and stress-free living is an indirect desire to remain an "unseasoned," immature Christian. Struggle makes us stronger; it builds us up and deepens our faith".

I sure don't want my desire to be to remain immature and sinful. I don't want to settle for and make my home in weakness and insecurity just because I hate the hard stuff. I don't want to give up where I could go, just for the sake of comfort.

But man, do I find it hard to stay still in the midst of the struggle. Everything within me wants to make it feel better. I just want to find a solution to ease the discomfort, even if it's not the best one...but the easiest and the fastest way to make things better.

"We have it so easy that we can begin to be lulled to sleep, thinking that life should be easy or that it will always be easy. Once it gets a little difficult, we tend to become consumed with trying to make our lives comfortable again. But by doing so we miss a great spiritual opportunity."

Sound familiar to you? It sure does to me, sadly!

I want to be steady in the Lord to be able to be still and know He is God in the midst of struggle, hard circumstances and conflict. I don't want to run away from whatever doesn't feel lovely. I want to grow in maturity. I want to embrace what God gives to me.

Yikes. Life isn't always easy!

Nightwatch #2!

I am just waking up from sleeping after our second Nightwatch earlier this morning. Apparently, my body only wants 5 hours of sleep following these nights, instead of the normal 8! Oh well!

So, again, we gathered at midnight and did our tear down by 5:30am. It was a fun night!

I did feel a little more tired this time around, but I was on nights the two nights before and strangely was far more tired than usually that last night at work. Not sure why. I got some candy and a slurpee to try and counteract my sleepiness for the Nightwatch =)

There does seem to be a bit of a different flavor to each of the nights that we've done in the last 2 weeks. The first Nightwatch had a theme of excitement and joy in the House. It was very refreshing! The excitement was high being our first one and all!

For me, this last night had a theme of intimacy. I felt the grace to come closer in intimacy with Jesus. I felt a drawing of my spirit and a moving of my heart. I still experienced some joy, but not the full throttle excitement like 2 weeks ago. I felt more of a deeper drawing of my heart. It was nice =)

Again, I am proud of all these young people who are willing to come and worship and pray in the middle of the night. I even has to work today! Yet they come and give themselves in this way throughout the night hours. I am pleased to report that their boldness is heightened in the night and I love hearing the ones that have more recently started to sing with Sanctuary, step out boldly and sing more confidently! I like hearing their voices and I'm sure the Father likes it even more!

There is something exciting about intercession sets in the middle of the night! And more people wanted to pray than usual! Woo! Hoo!!!! We stood and asked for God to send revival to our City and pour out His Spirit on the churches in Winnipeg! How fun is that?!

My prayer is that the Lord would move my heart forward in love, whether in the night or in the day. I want to love this One with my all.

The Nasty Flu Bug

I got hit with some kind of nasty flu bug which started letting its presence be known Tuesday evening. By Wednesday morning, I was feeling really nasty and spent the day on the couch, sleeping and running to my best friend, the bathroom =) All plans for that day were canceled.

Thursday I still couldn't eat really but I am such a committed employee and wanted to make it in for the stat that I dragged my butt to work Thursday to Friday night. I felt awful! But by morning, I thought things were getting a little better.

Then I woke up Friday afternoon with a sore stomach, a little nauseous, an extra sore wrist and had a little meltdown to my hubbie. I'm so thankful to have someone who cares for me and helps me make decisions when I need some assistance =) He passed me the phone and told me to call work and say I was sick.

I spent the evening on the couch and my poor wrist in the "claw".

Saturday morning I woke up undecided if I would be able to work that night. I stayed home and by 2pm was exhausted and went back to bed. I woke up at 4:15pm and felt more nauseous than the day before. After a very hard decision of whether or not to call in sick, I called in sick. Boy am I glad I did! The evening was even worse that the previous!

I was SUPER nauseous and back visiting my best friend =) I took 100mg of gravol in 4 hours which didn't work. I thought I'd try to sleep by 11:30pm.

The night was awful! I think I am really dehydrated, and that combined with a sore stomach and nausea, made me extremely agitated. I thrashed in bed, waking often and visiting my friend regularly, until 5:30am. I really wanted an IV bolus to hydrate me all night long! Too bad I didn't have the supplies to it myself at home =)

I did get a little rest between 5:30am and 11:00am which was good. My tummy still isn't happy but I've eaten 2 pieces of bread this morning! I need to force hydrate myself today.

Other than that 12 hour night shift I stupidly went to, I haven't left the house since Tuesday evening and it's Easter Sunday now! That is an eternity for an extrovert =) Thankfully I haven't been climbing the walls because I've felt too crummy.

Not a nice way to spend Easter! Healing to my body in the Name of Jesus!

I AM PUMPED!

We had our first Nightwatch as Sanctuary House of Prayer today in the wee hours of the morning. After preparing for an all-nighter with different means, such as naps, caffeine, sugar and prayer, the crew met at midnight to start our day in the prayer room.

It was an awesome bunch that came out to participate! There was 18 of us in total and from the moment I walked in the door to the time we were leaving, I was super excited!

We had different sets every hour or half hour with a mixture of Worship With the Word, Intercession and Devotional sets. I am so proud of everyone that participated! I am so proud of our "new-er" singers who got out there and gave it their all! They sounded awesome and really took ownership of the night =)

I feel so honored to have had the pleasure of being a part of the first Nightwatch. I pray that this breaks open the next stage in our history as a house of prayer. I know that if I was at another stage in my own life, I probably wouldn't get the opportunity of going out all night. So, I am incredibly thankful for where I'm at in life today. Totally blessed to have the freedom to spend 12am - 6am before the Lord and praying for my city, along side my friends, family and husband.

I just had to wake up even though I only had 5 hours of sleep....and I'M STILL FLYING HIGH! I feel refreshed after a night of prayer. I feel encouraged and reminded why I have chosen to live a lifestyle of prayer and worship and why I love it so. I feel a tad bit like Hammy from Over the Hedge...still =)

I will attribute it to joy. I felt joy in the house last night. I haven't felt joy like that at Sanctuary in many, many months. It was incredibly good for my soul =)

If there is joy and grace for the Nightwatch like that, sign me up anytime! I'd totally do that again!

Welcome to April!

Yeah! Another new month is here! That makes me happy!

March wasn't the greatest month for me. It was busy, busy with work and regular life. I did a couple of educational things (a conference on drug use in pregnancy and a first aid course) on my days off which made the month seem even more full. I am relieved to have March behind me and a new month to great me!

We are entering April in the midst of a winter wonderland. I don't mind it though! I think it's pretty and it makes me want to put up the tree and buy my husband a present =)

I'm looking forward to April for a number of reasons:

- we are having our first Sanctuary Nightwatch in the week hours of the night and morning. It is just a test run, but it is a first in our history! Yeah!

- we are celebrating my in-law's 25th wedding anniversary with is a great milestone!

- Easter is around the corner and that means a few family gatherings which I'm looking forward to

- I have a few coffees and lunches with friends and family that should be fun

- I have a meeting with my boss to chose my holidays for the year and am thinking about fall/early winter possibilities for some time away

- And I have a few more days then last month where nothing is scheduled. That is awesome! I have felt far too busy!

So, bring on a new month! I hope it is a great one!

Hotel Family Weekend

This past weekend my siblings, husband, mom and myself went to a hotel for the weekend. We go each year as a belated Christmas present from my mom. It has been a really fun tradition that we hope to continue for many more years! I think it will be so fun when we all have spouses and children and get away together for the weekend!

We spent our weekend relaxing, resting, hot tubbing, water sliding, eating yummy food, watching Steph, Shaun and Shane "fight", playing cards, watching some tv which we don't do at home, and just spending time together. It was nice!

Here are some fun pictures of our weekend to enjoy!


The first ones to arrive!


Can you feel the love?!


I think our smiles make us look like siblings...


Down for a morning swim!


Steph and I displaying our pedicured feet, as Shaun attempts to eat them!





My handsome husband and myself


The ladies of the evening


The gentlemen of the night


The fam celebrating belated birthdays at Joeys!


One last meal together to end the hotel family weekend!

Until next year!

Wounded me with love?

Some of you may be familiar with the concept of God wounding us with love. I've heard it in some worship songs over the years and must admit, I haven't understood the concept very clearly.

To me, it is similar to the story of the Shullamite in Song of Solomon, when the Lord's manifest presence is withdrawn from her experience for a time, which only leads her to long for more of Him and causes her to arise and run after Him.

Or how about the verse in Hosea 6:1, "Come, let us return to the Lord; For He has torn, but He will heal us, He has stricken, but He will bind us up". Who is this God who tears? Who strickens? Who wounds me but promises to heal me?

I have had some understanding on this topic over the last few days.

Things haven't been easy for me in the last few months.

Back in August, I experienced the Lord in a profound way, from what I can remember, while meditating on Him on my bed one morning or afternoon. It is now stuck in my heart memory as the place that I want to abide in all the time.

For whatever reason, soon after, it felt as though He took a step backward. That suddenly, I couldn't find Him quite so near, yet all the time knowing He wasn't too far away. I know that He'll never leave me, but I know He sometimes withdraws His tangible presence to cause me to recognize my longing and hunger and give up the lesser things to pursue Him for more!

I feel like He's wounded me. With love. Sounds strange, but it's exactly how I feel. He allowed me to experience Him in a deeper way and now I'm left wanting when I'm not living that encounter out regularly.

I pray for dreams, encounters and visitations regularly. I want to see the Lord. I want to experience the things of the Spirit while on this earth. But sometimes I think to myself, if I had a throne room experience, would I be truly ruined forever?

I suppose I would ache to return to that place. I assume I would long with a depth that I haven't experienced quite that deep to have the reality of God with man forever, and now please =)

So, I'm getting some clarity. It hasn't been easy, but I know it's to draw me deeper and closer to Him in love. It's recognizing the depth of communion that I want to abide in all the time. It's not about striving for it, but about running abandon after it. Wanting all things that create roadblocks to be set aside. To purse the One thing that I know is the only thing I really need.

In the Working World

A few more hours until......HOLIDAY TIME!

I'm getting ready for my last shift before holidays =) After today's shift, I'm off for 12 days technically. I say technically, because I actually go back the evening of my eleventh day off, but because it's a 12 hour night they consider it the 12th day. Whatever!

So, depending how you look at it, I'm off for the next 12 days or I'm off for the next 18 out of 20 days or I'm only working 4 more shifts in February! All good ways to look at the month ahead!

Yesterday was a little stressful for me at work. We just started doing part of our patient chart in an electronic way. So, we are all trying to learn how to look at orders, see what meds are due and how to sign for them, without using paper!

Yesterday was my first day working since we went "live" with the program. I sure was hoping NOT to be on the unit that I am the least familiar with, 3B.

It started off ok, as I was assigned to L & D for the first 8 hours of my shift. The last 3 of those hours were quite stressful and sometimes I wish I could magically take the pain away for women =) Then, what did I hope for? Not going to 3B on my first computer day?

Off to 3B for the last 4 hours of my shift. But, I guess God rearranged it so that going to 3B didn't sound so scary because it was actually a break from the situation I was trying to manage back on L & D. It was nice to know that I may be busy on 3B, but the emergent nature of L & D wouldn't be following me for the last 4 hours =) It was busy and a little frightening to learn the computer stuff, but I totally survived and it was fine! Another day on 3B under my belt will only help me feel more comfortable there!

Now if only one of these days I'd actually be able to work with my friend Christina already! That was the motivation to float to 3B =)

Off to work I go! And then it's time to relax and party!